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How to Get Over a Breakup

Last updated: Dec 07,23

How to Get Over a Breakup

Everyone may have experienced breakups. Breakups commonly cause a person to feel a lot of different feelings at once. It's normal to feel sad, lonely, or regretful, but it's also OK to feel angry, confused, exhausted, or maybe a little relieved.

Actually, the circumstances for the breakups can be complicated, and some breakups can be a relief after weeks or months of relationship struggles. A breakup can affect your mood and sleep patterns. Your appetite may change, and your general energy level may vary from one day to the next.

How can we get over a bad breakup?

In this blog, we'll discuss how to get over a breakup and introduce the 10 most common reasons for the breakup.


8 Tips on How to Get Over A Break

1. Keep Taking Care of Yourself

When you’re bogged down with feelings of despair, you don't think clearly and likely aren't thinking about your well-being at all. But this is when it’s most important. Previous research showed that breakups can lead to insomnia and compromised immune function. Harding says to focus on the basics: Keep up with your exercise routine, sleep well, eat a healthy diet, and maintain positive social connections.

2. Surround Yourself With People You Love

Your heart may be telling you to stay in bed and ignore the world outside, but getting out will likely make you feel better. A study published in the October 2021 International Association of Relationship Research found social interactions can protect against feelings of loneliness and depression. “Lean on your support system,” Leader says. Let your friends support you so you can have extra love around you. Say yes to invitations to catch up over coffee or hang out on the couch.

3. Put away as many painful reminders of your ex as you can.

“The healthiest coping mechanism is getting rid of everything associated with this person,” says Zaman, a professional counselor in Tucker, Georgia.

Maintaining the option for communication or even saving old texts or phone calls, according to Zaman, “keeps hope that [you’ll] possibly get back together. It could also hinder the ability to move on with your life without this person in it.”

That said, one day after you’ve processed the relationship and can even look back on it fondly, you may wish you still had certain mementos from your time together, which brings us to our next tip.

4. Don’t jump into another relationship

A lot of people tend to want to jump right back into the dating pool because it validates them and fills the void of rejection. It is perfectly normal to get on dating apps and acknowledge that there are lots of options. However, getting involved with someone before you’re ready may hurt them if they’re looking for a genuine connection while you’re simply looking for a distraction. You also run the risk of rebounding on the next person if you rush into it too soon. Dive in when you are truly ready to look for something.

5. Take One Day at A Time

You may feel overwhelmed after a breakup with all the decisions that you need to make. There may be all kinds of loose to tie up, and this stress could interfere with your sleep, work, or social life. So, it’s important to remember to take one day at a time after the breakup.

Each day after the breakup will feel a little bit easier. You need to set your sights on the future, which will most certainly look brighter than where you are standing today. Remember that it will take time to get healthy and whole again, and don’t rush any decisions that you need to make.

6. Talk About It. Write About It.

When you’re thinking back on your relationship, sometimes your brain goes into nostalgia mode. You start remembering only the good times and the happy parts. You start thinking, maybe it wasn’t all that bad. Maybe I won’t find anything better? Talk about it out loud and remind yourself about why it didn’t work. Write it down if you need to because there will be times when you have moments of weakness and those reminders will be helpful in confirming that you made the right decision.

7. Take a break from your normal routine.

It may be necessary for you to take a short break from your normal routine after a relationship ends. Having this time may help you to process your feelings and function better in the long run. Just make sure that you do not do anything that will threaten your other relationships or your livelihood.

For example, you may be able to skip your normal exercise class for a week without consequence, but you can’t skip work for a week. Use good judgment and explain your situation to your friends if you need to cancel any plans while you recover.

8. Allow yourself to grieve the loss of the relationship.

The end of a relationship can leave a big hole in your heart, which may require a significant grieving period. Make sure that you give yourself permission to grieve this loss and experience the pain that it causes. Otherwise, it may take longer for you to feel better and move on. Let yourself cry, scream, yell, or whatever you need to do to get your negative emotions out.

Try setting a daily time limit for grieving the loss of your relationship. Having a set amount of time to deal with these emotions will provide you with an outlet to vent while preventing you from dwelling on your emotions.


10 Most Common Reasons for Relationship Break-Ups

1. Poor communication skills

Communication issues are often the root causes of breakups in relationships.

Healthy communication creates an amazing cycle. Couples who are happy tend to communicate more, and couples who regularly communicate boost relationship satisfaction.

On the other hand, research published in the Journal of Divorce & Remarriage reports that 53% of the 886 couples polled cited a lack of communication as one of the most common reasons couples break up.

2. Long-distance woes

Why do relationships end? Couples in long-distance relationships may be less likely to last, say studies.

One of the more common reasons why couples break up in long-distance relationships is due to the partner’s not making an effort to meet in person or make plans for their future.

Research shows that long-distance couples who do not make plans to live in the same city as their spouse experience higher levels of distress, poor communication, and felt less satisfied in their relationship.

3. No emotional connection

One of the most common reasons couples break up is a lack of an emotional connection.

Emotional intimacy is a bond that goes beyond physical lust and chemistry. It’s a bond built over time through shared experiences and getting to know one another.

When an emotional connection is missing, a relationship can start to feel shallow and boring.

4. Money troubles

Why do people break up with people they love? Sometimes, money is at the root of their relationship distress.

This could be due to differences of opinion on spending or saving money, hiding money, sharing or withholding money, or misusing finances.

Relationship breakup statistics show that money is one of the most common sources of conflict for married couples. Financial tension is a common predictor of marital distress and dissolution.

5. Infidelity

Reasons to end a relationship often center around infidelity and broken trust.

Relationship breakup statistics in the Journal of Marriage and Divorce report that 70% of Americans will engage in some form of infidelity at some point during their marriage.

Further studies reveal that infidelity is one of the most common reasons people break up.

6. Excessive jealousy

Is your partner jealous? Are you constantly proving your whereabouts to your spouse or giving your partner access to your private apps and conversations to appease their insecurities?

Excessive jealousy can be overwhelming and can be a contributing factor in why couples break up.

7. Toxic or abusive behavior

One of the biggest reasons you should break up with your partner is if they are displaying physically or emotionally abusive behavior.

Statistics show that more than 10 million men and women will experience intimate partner violence each year in the United States. This often involves physical violence, stalking, threats, and other forms of victimization.

8. Sexual incompatibility

One reason why couples break up has to do with physical intimacy.

Sex isn’t everything in a relationship, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t important.

Aside from feeling great, sexual intimacy helps your body release the bonding hormone called oxytocin. This all-natural love potion helps boost trust and feelings of love and attachment. Sexual satisfaction is also a predictor of heightened emotional intimacy for couples.

Why do people break up? Sexual incompatibility, mismatched libidos, and an unwillingness to compromise on sexual matters are common reasons people break up.

9. There is no compromise

Why are relationships so hard? Compromise often plays a big role in relationship breakup statistics.

Couples who treasure compromise put their partner’s happiness before their own. Meeting in the middle on issues both big and small shows maturity, love, and teamwork.

On the other hand, couples break up when they can’t compromise and exhibit selfish and stubborn behavior.

10. You have unrealistic expectations

Why do people break up? One common reason why couples break up is due to unrealistic expectations in a relationship.

When you go into a relationship expecting your partner to be perfect, you are setting your relationship up for disaster.

Unrealistic standards or comparing your current spouse to a former love interest contributes to a good percentage of relationships that fail.


Conclusion

In this blog, we explored the challenging process of getting over a breakup and identified the most common reasons that lead to the end of relationships. By understanding these reasons and implementing the tips we discussed, you can navigate the healing journey with greater resilience and eventually find a path toward personal growth and happiness.

Breakups can be emotionally overwhelming, leaving us feeling heartbroken and lost. However, it's important to remember that healing takes time and that it's normal to experience a range of emotions during this process. The eight tips we discussed provide practical guidance for moving forward.

Remember that healing takes time, so be patient with yourself and focus on self-care. Embrace the opportunity for personal growth and know that brighter days are ahead.

Frequently Asked Questions About How to Get Over a Breakup

less What should I do if I still have feelings for my ex?

It's natural to have lingering feelings for an ex after a breakup. It's important to give yourself time to heal before considering reconciliation. Focus on self-care, reflect on the reasons for the breakup, and consider whether getting back together aligns with your long-term happiness and well-being.

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